Miracles Still Happen.....

Not only did I do all the training for 1 Half; I then ran 1 Half and NOW I'VE RUN TWO!

THAT IS A COMPLETE MIRACLE!

This may seem that I'm taking all this a bit too far and waaay too deep, but it really has been a spiritual journey for me.

In 2002 I wrote our first Christmas letter as a married couple. We went to Kona for our honeymoon and this is part of what I said in that letter, "We were fortunate to be on the island during the Ironman Triathlon. That is an amazing race to watch. I have no understanding why anyone would want to put their body through that, but it is astonishing what the body will endure." And up until January of this year, this is how I felt. Why beat yourself up? Why be in pain? That's for other people, not for me. I'm not that type of person. I - can't - do - that.

I don't believe that anymore. That is the real miracle.

I now understand that that was a lie I've told myself and whole heartily believed since I was young. The maker of lies encouraged and promoted the belief. That lie no longer has power over me! (well most of the time :-] )

This whole thing has been a long journey....that will forever be in progress.

I can't not talk about how God has opened my eyes.

I have been meditating on Hebrews 12:1-3 all Summer and it has somewhat become my "mantra". It is amazing how it just kind of says it all. Let me walk you through it the way it has been speaking to me. 1)Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses read chptr 11, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles all that stuff that holds us back and weighs us down from living the joyful life Jesus wants us to, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us changing our lives is hard work and the race is not just a one-time event, but a daily struggle and joy to do the next right thing - keep on putting the next foot in front of the other, no matter what. 2) Let us fix our eyes on Jesus put blinders on to what others are doing around you because they are not the measure of your worth or the guide of your life, the author and perfecter of our faith Wow, what a revelation! I don't have to do it. Jesus gave me my faith and He is the one who perfects it (makes it more like Him). I am only required to trust and obey. What a load off!, who for the joy set before Him endured the cross, scorning it's shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. What did Jesus do to persevere? Set His eyes on the joy that was ahead....being with God His Father. And me, for this moment, finishing a very long 13.1 miles and the joy of accomplishing that.  3) Consider Him who endured such opposition from sinful men, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart. Remember that Jesus has suffered much more than I have and He understands my struggles and that by looking to Him for my strength, I will not grow weary and lose heart.

I really did not feel good about the Half I did in October. Partly because I was focused on my time goal that I did not achieve and also because I grew weary and lost heart. I didn't have the right focus. I wanted glory for my accomplishment in doing a half in under 2 hours and 30 minutes. I was looking to me for strength, and me failed me. I was looking for glory and approval and worth because of what I had accomplished. When I didn't make my time goal and walked most of the last 3 miles, I felt like an utter failure for the most part. Yes, I had just finished a half marathon that I never in a million years thought that I would ever do, but that wasn't good enough. I didn't do it fast enough....I didn't work hard enough....I gave up. All of this is wrong thinking, but it opened my eyes to how much I had attached my worth to running this race and not just running it,  but it had to be within a certain time. That is why I immediately signed up for the Seattle Half Marathon, to get another chance to prove my worth (now looking back).

So God has been working on my heart. Showing me that I need to rely on Him for strength and worth and He will give me perseverance. I changed all my running songs to worship music to keep me focused on Him instead of the people around me (running past me). And to remind me to ask Him for strength instead of relying on just my efforts (especially those last 3 miles). I would recite Hebrews 12:1-3 to myself and just relax and praise Him.

Then I also had to humble myself a bit. My Dad asked me if I would like him to run with me. He would pace with me through the whole race. My immediate reaction in my mind was, "no way". Thinking, "I don't need anyone to help me. I'm not weak. I can do this myself." It took me awhile to get over my pride and to get to a point where I was thinking that it might be a good idea. I told Dad we were on. Oh yeah, I also drove the course and it almost scared me enough to drop out. Hilly! I had to work through that too and just tell myself that I just need to do the best I can and work through it. No time goals!

Dad, John (running the full marathon), Chad and Me

So it was just Sunday, November 28th - THE BIG DAY!

We couldn't have asked for more beautiful weather (especially after having snow for several days just prior). Thank you Lord! We were off through downtown Seattle! The first 7 miles were "heaven". Dad and I were feeling so good. We were hopeful that we had already done the steep hill, but as I was recalling that it was just after mile 7, we came up on it. A very steep, long incline. I literally got a little dizzy as I started running and then brisk walking up it. Then there was a long less steep hill to continue climbing. It took a lot out of me. On the hill the pacer for 2:45 went past me and my heart sank a little. I was  hopeful that I would come in around 2:30, but that just went out the door.  After we hit the top of the hill there was a long descent back down, so I just started sprinting down the hill. I wanted to take advantage of this "easy" time and catch back up to the 2:45 pacer and hopefully stay with her the rest of the race. I don't know if that ended up being a foolish decision or if it is why I came in under 3hrs. The rest of the course was long slight uphills and then down hill and then back up and then down and then.....you get the picture. I was totally spent. Dad was keeping the pace for us and I would run and walk to keep up with him. I'm really sure that I would have come in after 3hrs if I hadn't been with my Dad. I would have lost heart. The hills and the exhaustion and cramping  were overwhelming. It would have been hard to get past by myself. I'm so grateful that I got over my pride and had Dad run with me. A few days out.....it was a good time. :-)

My brother came in at an awesome 2:27 and Dad & I followed at 2:48, which I'm super proud of!

Now I was VERY certain while I was running the last part of this race that I was never going to do this to myself again. A 12k is a decent race. Anything under 10 miles is reasonable. 13.1 is just nuts, not to mention running a full marathon (as John did coming in at 5:19).

BUT the hurt doesn't last long and the glow of accomplishment is pretty awesome, so we're already planning to run another one in May. Dad may even be completely nuts and run a Full. He's going to need to do some prayin' to Jesus! LOL!